Many people look for strategies to break the ice in conversations. Of course, they end up coming up with a variety of helpful ideas. Even if they put these suggestions into practice, there is a chance that some of these people won’t be successful. That’s because even if you follow the suggestions, there’s still a chance you’ll engage in behaviors you’d be better off not engaging in.
That’s why it’s not important to follow the advice, but also to keep in mind the 4 mistakes you should avoid at the beginning of a conversation:
1. Don’t be too casual
When you’re talking to someone you don’t know, it’s not appropriate to start a conversation with an overly casual greeting. You can’t know whether or not the other person will take your casual manner appropriately. That’s why it’s much better to start a conversation with the question, “Hey, how are you?” rather than options like “What’s up?”.
The beginning of any conversation, as on Secretmeet, needs to be friendly enough to make the other person feel valued to pave the way for an unhindered continuation of the conversation, but it should also avoid getting too personal. It’s very helpful to know the other person’s interests, because that way you can choose a topic that isn’t biased, but still interesting.
Since every user profile on Secretmeet contains pretty detailed information about the hobbies, interests and main reasons for using the platform, it’s a piece of cake to start an interesting conversation.
2. Bragging is an absolute no-no
Even if you have a long list of accomplishments in your life and you’re justifiably proud of them, you should be careful not to brag about them during your first conversation with someone you’re just getting to know. This is especially important if you’re just starting a new friendship. This reflects poorly on you and can cause the other person to lose interest in interacting with you in a meaningful way in the future.
In order to have a reasonable conversation with the other person on Secretmeet, there must first be something for the two of you to talk about. According to the concept of effective communication, successful two-way communication can only occur when both speakers are actively engaged in the exchange on an equal level. However, if you’re constantly talking about yourself and not taking into account the ideas and viewpoints of the people around you, this goal will be impossible to achieve. It’s important that you make an effort to express genuine interest in the other person, as well as understanding and compassion, as much as possible.
3. Stay away from extreme statements
Making extreme statements about other people or topics is another big mistake people often make. You should avoid being very outspoken, even if you have a reputation for being honest, which is a great quality to have. Also, avoid giving unsolicited advice, that is, advice that hasn’t been specifically asked for by you.
Try to avoid phrases like:
– You’re wrong.
– Before you pass on the information, you should check it more carefully.
– I can’t understand your point of view.
– You’re way too gullible, dramatic or uninformed.
Active listening is one of the most important skills for effective communication on Secretmeet. This skill requires the ability to examine the other person’s thoughts, even if those views contradict your own point of view. This is the most effective way to understand the reasons for a person’s belief in anything and to recognize and accept the “other side” of existence.
When you start a conversation with a person you don’t know, you should be especially careful not to make controversial statements. Of course, if you’re talking to someone you’re already familiar with, you have the advantage of being able to share your genuine feelings as much as possible. However, if you behave this way, a conversation with a new person can be completely derailed.
4. Avoid personal questions
Chances are, you don’t like the idea of talking about your personal life in front of a complete stranger. Therefore, the last and most important mistake you should avoid on Secretmeet isn’t asking personal questions.
What kind of questions should you avoid when asking people about their personal lives?
- When exactly are you planning to get married?
- Are you currently dating anyone?
- What is your annual salary?
Not everyone feels comfortable revealing their private affairs. Therefore, such questions may cause the other person to withdraw from the conversation. Therefore, when talking to a stranger for the first time, it’s best to limit your questions to more general topics and not delve too deeply into their private life.
On Secretmeet, we’ve provided ready-made conversation starters for those shaky first few minutes. If you’re tired of making up your first sentences over and over again, you can use the conversation starters instead!
The next time you’re preparing to start a conversation with a complete stranger, make sure you not only follow the tips above, but also make sure you avoid the most common mistakes we’ve outlined above.