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5 Lessons From Patrick Bateman’s Skin Care Routine

patrick bateman skin care routine

Before there was Christian Grey, the original sharp-suited young sadist to permeate our modern consciousness was Patrick Bateman of the 2000 movie American Psycho. Which in my opinion was far more sadistic and has more sexual allure than Mr. Grey, who was a tremendous bore on-screen. But enough about that Bateman vs. Grey debate, I’m here to talk about the “Patrick Bateman Skin Care Routine.”

Yes ladies, along with business cards and murdering prostitutes (and even associates that gets on his nerves) Patrick Bateman has an obsession in maintaining his body and most especially his skin. He was a psycho serial killer who has a skin care routine as rigorous as his killings and Korean’s skin care routine. You can watch it on this video below:

He’s very detailed and organize isn’t he? Below are the 5 lessons I learned from that routine:

1. Treat puffy face with an ice pack

patrick bateman skin care rotuine

“In the morning, if my face is a little puffy I’ll put on an ice pack while doing stomach crunches. I can do 1000 now.”

nature republic eye gel patch

If Bateman held off on his favorite tipple J&B, that might prevent a puffy face in the morning. Alcoholic drinks can cause dehydration, and dehydration causes blood vessels to dilate, which inevitably leads to water retention around the face and gut. The ice pack treat really work but of course, putting frozen peas or an actual ice pack on your face is too unrefined. I suggest investing on Nature Republic’s Aqua Collagen Solution Marine Hydro Gel Eye Patch ($5.20), it’s an hydrating eye gel patch with the benefits of collagen such as anti-aging. Put in your refrigerator (not the freezer) and use it in the morning while you do stomach crunches a la Patrick Bateman, or at night to wake up to a glowing skin in the morning.

2. Use a cleanser before anything else

patrick bateman skin care routine

“After I remove the ice pack I use a deep pore cleanser lotion. In the shower I use a water activated gel cleanser…”

Cleansing is the first step to any skin care routine. It doesn’t make sense applying anything else before it because dirt will just mix with your other skin care products and will be washed off if you did cleansing last. Anyway, if Bateman were around today, he’d probably cleanse his face with an electronic cleansing brush that so trendy these days. But he wasn’t so let’s stick with good old cleansers that we know.

Cetaphil Daily Facial Cleanser ($6.99–10.99) is the most favorite and highly rated drugstore cleanser, it’s affordable and really works on all skin types. While Tata Harper Regenerating Cleanser ($38) is a bit pricey but it is the best natural face cleansers according to Rank & Style. If you prefer natural cleansers go for Tata Harper.

3. Exfoliate daily

patrick bateman skin care routine

 

“…then a honey almond body scrub, and on the face an exfoliating gel scrub.”

Exfoliating once or twice a week is an old way now. Ever since Korean Beauty gone global, they thought us that we should exfoliate daily and that said, they introduced to us the exfoliating products that are strong enough to exfoliate but mild enough for everyday use. Who knew Patrick Bateman was ahead of his time, at least on skin care!

Suki Exfoliate Foaming Cleanser ($33) does not have an honey almond scent like the one that Bateman used but it is the best body exfoliator based from Rank & Style’s study. While Su:m37 Miracle Rose Cleansing Stick ($34) is obviously not a gel scrub but it is a great exfoliating cleanser that can even remove your makeup during wash and highly recommended by Alice of W2Beauty and Refinery29.

patrick bateman facial mask

“Then I apply an herb-mint facial mask which I leave on for 10 minutes while I prepare the rest of my routine.”

Although putting on a facial mask can be counted as part of the moisturizing routine, in here it’s still part of Bateman’s exfoliating process.

Innisfree Green Tea Mask ($9) and it’s Hydro Gel Mask ($6) counterpart are infused with herbs and antioxidants to help revitalize your skin. Both are highly recommended by several blogs including Michelle Phan. But if you like to experience facial mask exactly like Patrick Bateman, I recommend FREEMAN Feeling Beautiful Cucumber Facial Peel-Off Mask ($4.29) it is minty like Bateman’s facial mask and can be peeled-off like his too. But most importantly it’s also a skin-quenching mask that gently peels away impurities that can cause skin to be rough and dull. No wonder it is one of Rank & Style’s best drugstore face mask.

4. Opt for products with little alcohol or no alcohol at all

patrick bateman skin care products

“I always use an after shave lotion with little or no alcohol, because alcohol dries your face out and makes you look older.”

Bateman make a good point on the alcohol. Although we, women, does not use after shave lotion on our faces does not mean where safe from this. Most toners we use contains a lot of alcohol! So make sure that before you purchase your next toner, check the ingredients on the back if it contains alcohol, or if it does look how much does it contains. I, personally, do not use products with no alcohol at all, from deodorants to toners. My favorite are the Benton products like Benton Aloe BHA Toner ($15), it’s perfect for all skin types. Benton replaces alcohol and even water with aloe vera and it helps prevent acne and black head and removes dead skin.

benton aloe bha toner

5. Moisturize, Moisturize, Moisturize!

patrick bateman grooming routine

“Then moisturizer, then an anti-aging eye balm followed by a final moisturizing protective lotion.”

I think I cannot stress enough how important moisturizing daily, because it helps to make your skin keep looking young and Patrick Bateman certainly does know that. He uses two different kinds of moisturizer because under eyes need a different formula than your entire face, like your face needs a different moisturizer than your body.

For your eyes, you can use RoC Retinol Correxion Sensitive Eye Cream ($23) and for your entire face, you can use RoC Hexinol Multi Correxion 5 in 1 Daily Moisturizer ($28). Bot are ranked as the best eye creams under $50 and best drugstore facial moisturizer by Rank & Style, respectively. Also take note: do not forget to out moisturizer on your hands and neck too! Aging appears on those areas too.

What do you think of the Patrick Bateman Skin Care Routine?

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Most Korean beauty products mentioned above are available in W2Beauty. If you shop there, don’t forget to enter this sponsor code 042322008 to get $5 off on your first purchase.